Sally-Ann Caligari is one uber-cool mamma! She surfs, skates, snow-skis down double black runs, dives with sharks … and is basically full of life!
But on a deeper level, she glows with a knowing wisdom that only comes from riding life’s tsunamis. Just talking to her you instantly get the sense that she knows herself and what she stands for.
In 2014, nine months after her daughter fell off a height and was airlifted to the Royal Children’s and four months after losing her beloved mother to cancer, Sal had a life-threatening bike accident that really gave her a whole new perspective on life.
Snapshot
Name: Sally-Ann Caligari (or Sal – but NEVER Sally!)
Resides: Moved to Ocean Grove in 2003. Grew up in Ballarat.
Age: 40
Star sign: Cancerian
Hubby – Anthony (TV producer for Tennis Australia): 42 – fun, loving, clever.
Daughter – Kalinda: 13 – beautiful, nurturing, connected.
Son – Kai: 11 – active, fun, caring.
Pets: Two chooks, two border collies and an 18-year-old cat.
Life motto:
I have three, is that OK?
· Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you.
· Always act and speak from truth and kindness.
· A family who plays together, stays together.
OK, let’s start at the beginning … how were your births?
Kalinda was scary, painful, crazy and arduous. Kai was just too quick! Both were beautifully natural.
You’re a passionate stay at home mum – what do you love about it the most?
This is THE ONLY time to do the most fulfilling and important job possible. As a parent and citizen, I understand I can never get this time back to foster amazing human beings.
Surely there’s a bit of schoolyard chatter when you walk (or skate) into school, “Here comes the coolest Mum”. Did you always surf, skate and ski?
(laughs) Before the kids were born I had this idea that I wanted them to be active and love the outdoors. I decided surfing, skating and skiing would be great ways to bond with them as a family. So it wasn’t until I was in my thirties that I took them all up (glad there’s no video footage of when I started!). I’m a firm believer that families that play together stay together.
What’s been your best parenting moment?
Gee, that’s hard to pinpoint. Its probably a culmination of all the times I was just there for my kids when they needed me – to hug, to listen, to pick them up when they fell and to push them to their limits to explore themselves and their surroundings.
What’s been your most challenging parenting moment?
Finding patience! Also to treat them as well as I would the neighbours kids.
How do you stay in control when they push you to the edge?
When they were little, I’d get out the iPhone to video record their tantrums – worked a treat! As much as I don’t like to admit it, after I’ve tried to quietly reason several times, I can’t help but resort to yelling my point. Unfortunately it works and quickly restores order. In my zen perfect parent moments I’ll find the grace to walk away (laughs).
Do you have a parenting philosophy?
Love, love and more love! Pretty easy, everything else comes secondary to that.
Now I know you’re passionate foodie – can you tell us about your healthy eating philosophy and what you feed the kids in a typical day?
I make sure our foods are straight from mother earth, not from a factory floor. Therefore we eat almost entirely whole foods, organic where possible. Fermented foods are AWESOME! We choose to limit wheat products where possible, not because we’re intolerant, but for many other reasons (a whole other article). That’s not to say I go without flours, I make choices other than wheat.
A typical day for the kids would be: breakfast – sourdough toast, chia pudding or green scrambled eggs; lunch – rice wraps with a protein source and salad; dinner – a protein source and at least three vegies in whatever fashion we choose; dessert – homemade ice-cream or quality chocolate. Snacks – anything homemade sweet or savory, homemade fruit icy poles and occasional treats.
On to a more serious note, three years ago life dealt you a pretty horrendous deck. Can you tell us about that?
Sure. Well, three major things happened all within the space of nine months. My daughter Kalinda fell from a height off a climbing wall and was airlifted to the Royal Children’s Hospital (thankfully she was fine), five months later my beautiful Mum passed away from cancer at the age of 60 and then I had a life-threatening bike accident.
My goodness, just one of those is hard enough to deal with on its own. What happened when you came off the bike?
It was a pure accident. I was riding home from school with Kai – I had to change direction quickly and brake at the same time. This sent me flying forwards and one of the handlebars went straight into my tummy. It crushed and ruptured my duodenum against my spine.
I was freakishly lucky that a particular surgeon (one of only a handful of surgeons in the world that had the experience to fix me) was on duty that day. Without him making quick decisions, I may not be here.
I can’t fathom how you would deal with all that at once. Tell me about your healing process?
The healing process was profound. I found a belief and a respect for myself I had never known before. I already thought I had a decent perspective on life, but it became so much clearer.
With the shock of Kalinda’s accident and mum having just passed away only four months earlier, I was still in the throws of grief and really questioning my faith in the universe. But surprisingly, through this accident, I was able to find an undeniable faith in the universe and a knowing that there was a greater good I was yet to pursue. I also had an unwavering feeling that my Mum was still looking after me, but this time from a higher power.
How has your view of life changed since?
I know how to bravely tackle change. I’ve got a stronger faith in the universe and that ‘what is meant to be will be’. I know every adversity can be met with a greater opportunity if we’re open to it. And I know life is there for the taking – so what are we waiting for?
So, what’s next for Sally-Anne?
Well, I feel you’ve really caught me at a transitional time. My kids have now reached a certain level of independence and have found their own identities and individuality (to a point), which frees me up to do more of what fills my cup when they’re off filling their own.
I’m ready to show the kids that I too can follow my dreams of what I’m good at and that change is great. Exciting times!
If you could pass on one piece of advice to other parents what would it be?
Parenting is not, never has been and never will be easy. It’s selfless and hard work. Take responsibility for what you have created and give tirelessly of these two things with loving truth and kindness. What you then get back from your children will be the greatest reward imaginable. Oh, and trust your instincts.
