By Casey Neill
Melia Haugh hadn’t given motherhood much thought – until it was taken off the table.
The Herne Hill mum was diagnosed with leukaemia at age 19.
“I was so sick that they didn’t have time to do egg retrieval,” she said.
“I got a childhood leukaemia that I was basically too old to get.
“The doctors made up their own protocol for me. They did some epic things to save my eggs.”
They put her reproductive system into menopause, injecting drugs into her abdomen using a “massive needle”.
Chemotherapy is attracted to fast-growing cells like eggs, so doctors hoped pressing pause on ovulation would keep them safe while they treated her cancer.
“As soon as I started treatment I felt better,” Melia said.
“I’d been sick for a few months and nobody knew what was wrong with me.
“No one knew until the last minute, when I was basically unable to move.”
Melia didn’t know whether the attempts to save her eggs had been successful until she fell pregnant almost 10 years later, at age 28.
“I’d had a relationship with an IVF doctor because I understood the process that might occur in the future,” she said.
“Before I could see her I knew I had to be off the pill and trying for a certain amount of time.
“I made a future appointment, only to find I fell pregnant naturally.
“We thought it was going to be a long process.
“When it happened after only a few months, I was like ‘crap, am I ready?’.
“At the same time it was a little miracle.
“It was awesome and it was stressful because I’d just started a business.”
The Soft Hospitality Group managing director described the period after welcoming Lexi, now 5, as stressful and high-intensity.
“When Lexi was born, I really wanted to keep working,” she said.
“She was an easy baby and I was lucky.
“Having her with me, I got the best of both worlds.”
Melia was already step-mum to Frankie, now 11, from her husband Shane’s first marriage.
“Having Frankie in my life when I met Shane was part of the reason I wanted to have a baby of my own,” she said.
“I met her when she was 4 and it was a joy to have her in our household.”
Melia then welcomed Addison, who’s almost 2.
“They’re the perfect sisters,” she said.
“With Addison it felt like I was losing my identity a little bit.
“I needed to figure out what the new norm was.
“That balance with a baby, a four year old and a pre-teen…it was hard to navigate in the beginning.”
She had to re-centre and accept things needed to change.
“I think it was about me actually taking some time off from the business – I needed some maternity leave this time,” she said.
“I needed to relax, get my body better.”
Melia had always wanted to open a cafe.
“I’ve been a career hospo girl ever since I can remember,” she said.
She and Shane were living in Melbourne when the opportunity to open Soft in Geelong arose, so they moved to follow her dream.
“My cafe is my baby as well,” Melia said.
“It’s such a community atmosphere.
“I love the adrenaline.
“While you’re in the middle of it, it’s crazy.
“As a family, we’ve always been going to cafes and to restaurants.
“That was our ‘camping’. That was what we did.
“I want to bring that atmosphere to other families.
“It was always part of the venue, but it’s grown. I see how my kids interact with it.
“I can take my kids in there at any point and they can enjoy the atmosphere while I’m working.
“The staff are like aunties and uncles to my kids.”
Melia said juggling a business and a family could be nuts.
“I’m so lucky that my husband works nine to five, because I don’t,” she said.
“It’s a modern day marriage. He does the cleaning and the washing.
“I’m out on Saturdays. We have Sundays as a family.
“It’s about creating a schedule and having that communication.
“I’m working my arse off and having the career I wanted and showing all of them if you work hard, you can get what you want.
“It’s important that as a mum you have your career goals and your passions and you don’t give it up necessarily, if you don’t want to.
“You can do whatever you like.”
